I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who did Billy Mays play for?
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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