he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Randomize
