Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I want to fling myself into the sun
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
