I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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