; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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