Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Randomize
