...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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