we have pet lesbian snakes
Pants 0. Shit 1.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
now i know why i became what i already was.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
