maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
