Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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