I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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