I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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