Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize