I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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