The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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