did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
