I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
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