oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
