So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
