I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
