Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
