I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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