Life is so much better after having sex.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
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