Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
