i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize