Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
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I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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