im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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