is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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