In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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