girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
