i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
