i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Randomize