Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
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