some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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