Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
