i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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