I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
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