I'm drive I can fine osifer
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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