We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
