guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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