dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Randomize