Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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