why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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