I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
where does the pee come out of this thing
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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