Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Randomize
