No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
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She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
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I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
If its not for food we ain't going out.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
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