Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
there is puke in my bra ... again
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
