I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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