what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
