Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize