I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
